The Nicene Creed

I believe in one God, the Father almighty,

    maker of heaven and earth,

    of all things visible and invisible.

I believe in one Lord Jesus Christ,

        the Only Begotten Son of God,

        born of the Father before all ages.

    God from God, Light from Light,

        true God from true God,

    begotten, not made, consubstantial

       with the Father;

        Through him all things were made.

    For us men and for our salvation

        he came down from heaven,

        and by the Holy Spirit was incarnate

        of the Virgin Mary,

        and became man.

    For our sake he was crucified

      under Pontius Pilate,

        he suffered death and was buried,

        and rose again on the third day

        in accordance with the Scriptures.

    He ascended into heaven

        and is seated at the right hand of the Father.

    He will come again in glory

        to judge the living and the dead

        and his kingdom will have no end.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,

        the Lord, the giver of life,

    who proceeds from the Father and the Son,

    who with the Father and the Son

        is adored and glorified,

        who has spoken through the prophets.

I believe in one, holy, catholic,

     and apostolic Church.

    I confess one baptism for the forgiveness of sins

        and I look forward to the resurrection

        of the dead and the life of the world to come.

Amen.

My Conversion Story

I officially became a "card-carrying Catholic" on April 7, 2012. It was truly THE best day of my entire life. It had been a very long journey but SO worth it!

After having been a practicing Wiccan for almost 18 years, I found myself at a crossroads in 2005. Wicca didn't feel right anymore. It stopped feeling like a part of me and became more like something out of a fairy tale, something that wasn't real, something that was now a waste of my time. I tried to shake off the feeling, but it was pretty persistent. There was no doubt in my mind that it was time to move on.

But move on to what?  Where do you turn when suddenly the only thing that meant anything to you now meant nothing?  I knew I wanted the TRUTH. I wanted something real. So I went searching for it. I attended a charismatic church with my family. I researched Christian Science. I had some Vaishnava friends who shared their experiences (and some of their mantras, too!). I looked into Buddhism. None of these things worked for me. I just wanted peace and truth. That's all. Why was it so hard to find??

I finally began learning about the Catholic faith through a friend of mine who was a Catholic convert and raising her family as Catholic. It intrigued me. I loved hearing about her praying the holy rosary (I bought one at a Christian book store, learned all the prayers that went with it and the Mysteries, then learned them all in Latin as well). I loved reading about the lives of the saints, many who had lived lives full of sin before changing and committing their lives to God). I loved the prayers. I loved how I could walk into a Catholic church and not have my eardrums busted by loud music, or a room full of theatrics, or an overly-animated preacher yelling from the pulpit. It felt like it was just me and God. It felt sacred. It felt right.

But more than anything else, I knew that with the Catholic Church, I had found the truth that I was looking for. The Catholic Church can rightfully claim apostolic succession from the current Pope all the way back to St. Peter, whom Christ had given the keys to the kingdom (if someone wants to argue this point, the burden of proof is on them ... let them do the research and they'll find that they wasted their time). The Catholic Church is the ONLY church that has ALL four marks of the one true church established by Christ Himself (these four marks are: one, catholic, holy and apostolic). The Catholic Church has held strong to her teachings since she was established, not just swaying and changing when society decides it's time to relax the rules of faith a little. Why?  Because these truths come from Christ himself, not someone who is twisting and interpreting the Scriptures to suit whatever works at the time. The Catholic Church is essentially going to be the same wherever you go in the world; there aren't congregations that break up and form their own churches and denominations just because they don't care for what the preacher is telling them. I love that sense of universality and solidarity. I love that we have a Pope to guide us in our faith. THIS was what I was looking for and once I found it, I never looked back.

I am the only one in my family who is Catholic. It was a big step to take. Some people laughed when I told them I was going to convert. Some mocked. Some went into tirades about the scandals of the Catholic Church (yes, we have disgraceful people in the Catholic Church just as in EVERY OTHER CHURCH). Some didn't believe I was serious. But thankfully, some supported me wholeheartedly as I walked this new journey of faith.

And so on April 7, 2012, I was baptized. I was confirmed (choosing St. Faustina as my confirmation saint). And I was finally able to receive Holy Communion, the real (not symbolic) Body and Blood of Christ. My past was no longer there to haunt me. I was a new person because of the love of God and the sacrifice of Christ. I found the truth and have never looked back. :)

The Worst Thing You Ever Did

Sometimes the perfect blog topic falls right into my lap. ;)  A friend posed this question yesterday: "What if your identity, your existence was defined by the worst thing you ever did?"

I love this question because it not only made me think about how *I* would feel, but also how I handle other people's past mistakes. In my 37 years of life, I have done some pretty despicable things. If I were to be judged only on the worst thing I ever did, I just don't know if I could live with myself. There would be no chance for redemption. Of course, what one person saw as the worst thing I ever did may be totally different than what someone else saw as my worst thing, so I'd be going through life with all of this ugliness hanging over my head, branding me a big loser to everyone I knew!  I can only imagine the things I'd be branded with. I shudder just thinking about it.

What about you?  If you were defined by the worst thing you ever did,  how would you feel?  Is it something that you could deal with, or is it something that would eat you up inside?  Is it something you could brush off or something you would spend the rest of your life trying to get out from under?

Jesus told St. Faustina (my beloved confirmation saint, by the way!), "My mercy is so great that no mind, be it of man or of angel, will be able to fathom it throughout all eternity.” How thankful I am that no matter how awful my past is, no matter what the worst thing is that I have done, I can be forgiven. The only one whose opinion of me truly matters is God's. Granted, in this earthly life, I'd love to have everyone I've ever hurt or everyone who's been a victim of my past mistakes to forgive me, but even if that doesn't happen, I can find solace in God's mercy and forgiveness.

As our Blessed Savior was dying on the cross, one of the things He said was,"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."(Luke 23:34)  Stop and ponder that statement for a moment. After He had been subjected to all forms of cruel torture and the nails were hammered into His flesh, Christ asked God to forgive the ones who did it AND to forgive US because it was our sins that pierced his flesh with those nails. How do we handle forgiving those who hurt us?  How often do we leave the past in the past?  Speaking for myself, it's sometimes very hard. We equate holding a grudge against someone with having power over them. We can pull up their past and use it to hurt them. What does that say about us?  Does that not make us even lower than whatever they did?  Just something to think about.

Praying that today God touches my heart and really helps me to forgive those who have hurt me or caused me grief in the past so that I, too, may be forgiven by Him for things I may have done to others.

Understanding Purgatory (Yes, It Exists!)

One of the things I learned during my adult faith formation classes before I converted to Catholicism is that Protestants do not believe in purgatory. Up until I was taking those classes, I didn't know it existed as it does; I considered purgatory and hell to be one and the same. They couldn't be more different!

It is a popular belief (especially with Protestant denominations) that when a person is baptized and commits their lives to Christ, they are bound for Heaven, no pitstops in between. This is both presumptuous and erroneous. We are not promised that we're going straight to Heaven immediately upon death. That would be nice, but it's not realistic. We console each other by saying, after a loved one's death, that they're in Heaven now and that everything is fine. The truth is that, unless they lived a life of incredible holiness, they're probably not there yet. And unless they consciously chose to reject God and His love for them, they're not in hell, either. So where do they go?  The answer is purgatory.

Purgatory is a place where the dearly departed WHO ARE ASSURED OF GOING TO HEAVEN go to be purified of any stain of sin that was on their soul when they passed from this earth. If you drop dead the moment you walk out of the Confessional and you've really honestly confessed all the sins you could remember and were absolved of your sins, you can pretty much be assured of going straight to Heaven. But that's pretty much one of the only ways that I can think of. 

I believe that purgatory is just another one of God's mercies toward us sinners. He doesn't want us to be separated from Him, but nothing unclean can enter into Heaven (can you even begin to imagine how awesome it will be when we finally get there?!). In His mercy, He allows us to spend some time in purgatory to purge all of our sins, to cleanse us completely so we can enter into Heaven with Him. It is not meant as punishment (although some may view it to be so because they are temporarily separated from God).

Each time I pray the rosary, I begin with offering it up for all the souls in purgatory, especially the souls of my departed family and friends. We have many opportunities to help the souls in purgatory, but few take the time to do it, and even more don't even know that our prayers, rosaries, Masses, Stations of the Cross, etc., help them.  When I think about my loved ones who have passed from this world, I know that I don't know where they are, but I cannot think of any reason at all why any of them would be anywhere but in Heaven or headed there. A powerful prayer for those in purgatory is this:

O Lord, who art ever merciful and bounteous with Thy gifts, look down upon the suffering souls in purgatory. Remember not their offenses and negligences, but be mindful of Thy loving mercy, which is from all eternity. Cleanse them of their sins and fulfill their ardent desires that they may be made worthy to behold Thee, face to face, in Thy glory. May they soon be united with Thee and hear those blessed words which will call them to their heavenly home: "Come, blessed of My Father; take possession of the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.

Another, simpler one goes like this:

Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord; And let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace. Amen.

In turn for our prayers, once they are released from purgatory, they will be some of our most powerful intercessors before the throne of God!  They will help us because we helped them. There are so many souls in purgatory who remain there for terribly long amounts of time because they have no one to pray for them (or not one who WILL pray for them). No prayer for the souls in purgatory ever gets wasted. God's mercy will never be outdone, either. :)  So let us remember this the next time our loved ones leave this life for their eternal one.