Today has been very rough so far but I am determined to put it in God's hands and allow Him to guide whatever happens. I submit myself to His will, whatever that may be. It may not be what I want to happen, but I am praying that He will have mercy on my situation and that everything will work out.
People have said to me that I have so much faith, and that they wished they could have as much as I do, but truth be told, I am just like everyone else. I have days where I am just as afraid and uncertain as the next person. It always reminds me of Mark 4:40 where Jesus said, "Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?" when the disciples feared the stormy sea and for whatever reason didn't have the faith that Jesus could calm the craziness around them. Jesus Christ calms all of the storms in our lives if we truly believe and truly have faith. And, yes, sometimes in all of the earthly trials, I do forget that. I'm ashamed that I forget that and lack the faith some days, but God is merciful even to little goofballs like me.
It is times like these when I feel so badly for those who don't believe in our Father. I wonder who they turn to when things go wrong, who they seek out when their lives are falling apart and they are full of despair. I have been down that road myself years ago and there is nothing worse than feeling empty and broken and having nowhere to turn. Everything seems darker and more desolate when you are alone. The good thing is that God never leaves us. We may turn away from Him, mock Him and deny His existence, but as soon as that lightbulb goes off and we realize how mistaken we are and how contrite we are for what we've done, He is there waiting for us, arms open and ready to bring us into His embrace again. All of us sin in one way or another, even on a day-to-day basis, sometimes without even realizing it until later. I am guilty of this myself, which is why I always try to remember to ask God for His forgiveness in my evening prayers. I am not perfect and not a day goes by in my life where I am sinless. I may try to do good for others, try to do the right things, but even if there is a speck of anger, bitterness, jealousy, etc. in my heart toward another person, that is a sin. Thankfully, God forgives us and loves us anyway! Now if only we could all be that way, huh? ;)
Monday, August 30, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
In The Right Direction
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer...
This is something that I'm working on today. The past few days have been a trial in more ways than one. I have lost my bearings on a couple of occasions. I am so thankful that God is so graciouis, so loving and so kind as to help me back to my feet again and point me in the right direction!
Each night before I go to bed, I write down my blessings, things that have made me happy during the day. It really helps me to remember that even though sometimes it seems dark and uncertain, God doesn't withhold the good things! Sometimes we are just so wrapped up in our own issues that we don't see what is right in front of us.
Today will no doubt be a wonderful day and I hope that it brings you many blessings as well! :o)
This is something that I'm working on today. The past few days have been a trial in more ways than one. I have lost my bearings on a couple of occasions. I am so thankful that God is so graciouis, so loving and so kind as to help me back to my feet again and point me in the right direction!
Each night before I go to bed, I write down my blessings, things that have made me happy during the day. It really helps me to remember that even though sometimes it seems dark and uncertain, God doesn't withhold the good things! Sometimes we are just so wrapped up in our own issues that we don't see what is right in front of us.
Today will no doubt be a wonderful day and I hope that it brings you many blessings as well! :o)
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
The Rosary
Those who know me in "real life" and on a daily basis know how important the rosary is to me. It is the first thing I do in the morning, sometimes even before I step foot out of bed. It helps me to focus, to start the day off close to our Lord and our sweet Mother Mary. Typically, I pray a full rosary three times a day; the first for myself, the second for my family (and friends!) and the third for vocation. It takes about twenty minutes each time (unless I'm doing it in Latin, which is sometimes 5-10 minutes longer) and I certainly cannot claim that spending an hour a day in prayer is too much!
The benefits of praying the rosary are so great that I'll only touch on a few of them here. First -- it gives me complete peace. No matter what mood I am in when I pick up those rosary beads, my spirit is instantly lifted as I focus on the prayers. I sometimes grab the rosary beads when I'm angry or upset and just start praying and almost immediately, those bad feelings diminish. Second -- it helps me to know that our Blessed Mother hears those prayers and intercedes for me for all of my intentions if it is God's will that they be granted. Third -- it gives me comfort in times of illness or distress. When my time is spent in prayer, I have less time to spend worrying! Fourth -- it helps me to know that praying the rosary is something that Mary has asked us to do here on earth. To do what our Lord's Mother asks us to do should be an honor for all of us. After all, she was the one who submitted to God's will and gave birth to the One who would save us all -- it's the least we can do!
Of course, there are also the Fifteen Promises for Praying the Rosary (straight from Mary herself!): 1) Whosoever shall faithfully serve me by the recitation of the Rosary shall receive signal graces. 2) I promise my special protection and the greatest graces to all those who shall recite the Rosary. 3) The Rosary shall be a powerful armor against hell, it will destroy vice, decrease sin and defeat heresies. 4) It will cause good works to flourish; it will obtain for souls the abundant mercy of God; it will withdraw the hearts of men from the love of the world and its vanities, and will lift them to the desire for Eternal Things. Oh, that souls would sanctify themselves by this means. 5) The soul which recommends itself to me by the recitation of the Rosary shall not perish. 6) Whosoever shall recite the Rosary devoutly, applying himself to the consideration of its Sacred Mysteries shall never be conquered by misfortune. God will not chastise him in His justice, he shall not perish by an unprovided death; if he be just he shall remain in the grace of God, and become worthy of Eternal Life. 7) Whoever shall have a true devotion for the Rosary shall not die without the Sacraments of the Church. 8) Those who are faithful to recite the Rosary shall have during their life and at their death the Light of God and the plenitude of His Graces; at the moment of death they shall participate in the Merits of the Saints in Paradise. 9) I shall deliver from purgatory those who have been devoted to the Rosary. 10) The faithful children of the Rosary shall merit a high degree of Glory in Heaven. 11) You shall obtain all you ask of me by recitation of the Rosary. 12) All those who propagate the Holy Rosary shall be aided by me in their necessities. 13) I have obtained from my Divine Son that all the advocates of the Rosary shall have for intercessors the entire Celestial Court during their life and at the hour of death. 14) All who recite the Rosary are my Sons, and brothers of my Only Son Jesus Christ. 15) Devotion to my Rosary is a great sign of predestination.
How can we go wrong here? ;)
So there you have it -- a very important part of my day-- the Holy Rosary.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Prayer of Thanks
Thank you for the obstacles that are put in my path because it makes me cling to you even more. I realize that I am not able to handle everything on my own and that you are more than willing to meet me halfway or even take on the burden if I simply ask for your help. You never give me more than I can handle and you never leave me without the sweetness of your grace and mercy. You know exactly what I need before I ask even though sometimes I forget that!
Thank you for turning my anger this morning into forgiveness and releasing me from those bonds of bitterness and anger, and allowing me to go on with my day without my heart being full of the need for revenge. I have no doubt that whatever happens on earth will be dealt with by you when the day comes, so there's no point in me wasting my time dwelling on it. There are things that are beyond my control, but nothing is beyond yours!
I stop and think about the many blessings that you send my way each and every day - all of the smiles, all of the kind words, all of the wonderful friends who have such huge hearts, the silliness, the love that surrounds me, and most of all, your love and forgiveness. All of the greatest things in my life come from you.
There are days, like today, when it isn't easy. I stumble and I fall, but you never leave me. When all else fails, you never fail me. When I feel like I'm at my lowest, you are there with a loving embrace, ready to lift me up and give me wings to soar. Your love, mercy and goodness are infinite!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Blessings
I am truly so blessed beyond what I deserve. Each day, no matter what happens, there is always at least one blessing that was unexpected. I was so angry and upset on Thursday about something, but by the end of the day, I was fine with it. I was talking to my Mama about it over the phone and found myself saying, "It's going to be fine." Really? It's going to be fine? Where did that even come from considering ten minutes before that, the first words out of my mouth before I even said hello were, "Mama, please tell me that my head is NOT about to explode!" Our sweet and wonderful Lord has a way of calming that fire down inside, doesn't He? As soon as the words, "it's going to be fine" left my mouth, I truly believed that they would be. God has never let me down before. I have said it over and over again that my main issue is my lack of patience in these matters. If it's something that upsets me, it's like I take leave of my senses temporarily and have no patience at all. God is probably looking down on me, shaking His head and wondering, "Where is your faith, girl?" It reminds me a lot of Mark 4:40 where it says, "Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?" I have no doubt that God is testing my patience because He knows that this is a major thing I need to work on right now.
I had such a wonderful surprise last night. I found out that a friend of mine had gifted me with a paid subscription to a website that I use frequently because my subscription had expired the day before. He told me he could afford to do so and that he was happy to do it because he enjoyed reading the things I wrote, that there were no strings attached and not to even think about paying him back, it was a gift. To say my heart was bursting with his thoughtful gesture would be an understatement. I am so thankful for people like him who are in my life, who do things out of the kindness of their hearts. It helps me to strive to be more like them. They are wonderful reminders of God's love for us and the love we should have for each other!
Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the many blessings that you bring to my life. Help me to stay patient and strong in times of adversity and weakness. Thank you for staying by my side even when I don't always do the right things. Please continue to work on me and help me to be a better person in all ways so that all that I do may glorify You. Amen.
I had such a wonderful surprise last night. I found out that a friend of mine had gifted me with a paid subscription to a website that I use frequently because my subscription had expired the day before. He told me he could afford to do so and that he was happy to do it because he enjoyed reading the things I wrote, that there were no strings attached and not to even think about paying him back, it was a gift. To say my heart was bursting with his thoughtful gesture would be an understatement. I am so thankful for people like him who are in my life, who do things out of the kindness of their hearts. It helps me to strive to be more like them. They are wonderful reminders of God's love for us and the love we should have for each other!
Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the many blessings that you bring to my life. Help me to stay patient and strong in times of adversity and weakness. Thank you for staying by my side even when I don't always do the right things. Please continue to work on me and help me to be a better person in all ways so that all that I do may glorify You. Amen.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Moving Forward
Last night, I sat down and wrote my brother a four-page letter (he's in jail for a while... he has time to read that sorta stuff!). Those of you who've been following me for a while know that we have a REALLY strained relationship and have for years. I truly believe that God had a hand in all of this because as I sat down to write, there was no anger anymore, no bitterness, just me writing a letter to my brother, letting him know that we are here for him when he gets out. I tried to explain that he needs to get himself straightened out, get a job (a LEGIT one this time!) that he can have pride in and hold his head up and THEN he can find a good girl to settle down with. Right now, he's falling for these women who are as messed up as he is and they just keep each other from moving forward and trying to do better. I told him that I love him and that I hated the feud between us, that we've had a lot of family gatherings that I wished he'd been a part of if he'd had his act together because he can be so funny and wonderful when he's not being shady. Afterward, I called my mom and told her about it. She said that my letter could be what helps him to turn around because he's thought for a long time now that I truly hated him, and if he gets that letter of support and encouragement, it may make him really think about things, about changing, when he is released. I sure hope so.
He's actually been made a trustee at the jail so he's happy that he at least has things to do during the day to make the hours pass a little more quickly, and he gets extra food and snacks for the help that he does. That's much better than sitting in the cell, crying on the phone for our Mama to sell her soul to get him out!
Hope everyone has a great day and that God does something great in your life today!
He's actually been made a trustee at the jail so he's happy that he at least has things to do during the day to make the hours pass a little more quickly, and he gets extra food and snacks for the help that he does. That's much better than sitting in the cell, crying on the phone for our Mama to sell her soul to get him out!
Hope everyone has a great day and that God does something great in your life today!
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
Patience
It's been a long four days with Dylann being so sick. She's had so many prayers offered up for her and I know that God is listening. We just have to be patient. I've been praying the rosary several times during the day and night and I know that is helping. After so many days of seeing her miserable and in tears from the pain and from throwing up, it was such a blessing to see her SMILING and LAUGHING earlier! I'd brought a chair in to sit beside her bed and try to catch up on some sleep and she woke up and gave me this incredulous look like, "What in the world are you doing here?" I explained what I was doing and she kept giving me that look. So I popped off with something sarcastic and silly and the next thing I knew, she was just cracking herself up with things that weren't even all that funny to ME, but they were obviously hysterical to her, LOL. She ate a little bit of something and now she's in the bath, hopefully warming up those achy muscles and getting to feel a little better.
The outpouring of love and prayers were her has been overwhelming. I am so thankful that God has brought such amazing people into my life, people who are there to give me strength when things like this happen. There is nothing worse than seeing your child sick and in pain and not knowing what to do about it. I know that God is in control and that perhaps this is just a lesson in patience for Dylann and I both.
The outpouring of love and prayers were her has been overwhelming. I am so thankful that God has brought such amazing people into my life, people who are there to give me strength when things like this happen. There is nothing worse than seeing your child sick and in pain and not knowing what to do about it. I know that God is in control and that perhaps this is just a lesson in patience for Dylann and I both.
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Monday, August 30, 2010
Days Like These
Today has been very rough so far but I am determined to put it in God's hands and allow Him to guide whatever happens. I submit myself to His will, whatever that may be. It may not be what I want to happen, but I am praying that He will have mercy on my situation and that everything will work out.
People have said to me that I have so much faith, and that they wished they could have as much as I do, but truth be told, I am just like everyone else. I have days where I am just as afraid and uncertain as the next person. It always reminds me of Mark 4:40 where Jesus said, "Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?" when the disciples feared the stormy sea and for whatever reason didn't have the faith that Jesus could calm the craziness around them. Jesus Christ calms all of the storms in our lives if we truly believe and truly have faith. And, yes, sometimes in all of the earthly trials, I do forget that. I'm ashamed that I forget that and lack the faith some days, but God is merciful even to little goofballs like me.
It is times like these when I feel so badly for those who don't believe in our Father. I wonder who they turn to when things go wrong, who they seek out when their lives are falling apart and they are full of despair. I have been down that road myself years ago and there is nothing worse than feeling empty and broken and having nowhere to turn. Everything seems darker and more desolate when you are alone. The good thing is that God never leaves us. We may turn away from Him, mock Him and deny His existence, but as soon as that lightbulb goes off and we realize how mistaken we are and how contrite we are for what we've done, He is there waiting for us, arms open and ready to bring us into His embrace again. All of us sin in one way or another, even on a day-to-day basis, sometimes without even realizing it until later. I am guilty of this myself, which is why I always try to remember to ask God for His forgiveness in my evening prayers. I am not perfect and not a day goes by in my life where I am sinless. I may try to do good for others, try to do the right things, but even if there is a speck of anger, bitterness, jealousy, etc. in my heart toward another person, that is a sin. Thankfully, God forgives us and loves us anyway! Now if only we could all be that way, huh? ;)
People have said to me that I have so much faith, and that they wished they could have as much as I do, but truth be told, I am just like everyone else. I have days where I am just as afraid and uncertain as the next person. It always reminds me of Mark 4:40 where Jesus said, "Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?" when the disciples feared the stormy sea and for whatever reason didn't have the faith that Jesus could calm the craziness around them. Jesus Christ calms all of the storms in our lives if we truly believe and truly have faith. And, yes, sometimes in all of the earthly trials, I do forget that. I'm ashamed that I forget that and lack the faith some days, but God is merciful even to little goofballs like me.
It is times like these when I feel so badly for those who don't believe in our Father. I wonder who they turn to when things go wrong, who they seek out when their lives are falling apart and they are full of despair. I have been down that road myself years ago and there is nothing worse than feeling empty and broken and having nowhere to turn. Everything seems darker and more desolate when you are alone. The good thing is that God never leaves us. We may turn away from Him, mock Him and deny His existence, but as soon as that lightbulb goes off and we realize how mistaken we are and how contrite we are for what we've done, He is there waiting for us, arms open and ready to bring us into His embrace again. All of us sin in one way or another, even on a day-to-day basis, sometimes without even realizing it until later. I am guilty of this myself, which is why I always try to remember to ask God for His forgiveness in my evening prayers. I am not perfect and not a day goes by in my life where I am sinless. I may try to do good for others, try to do the right things, but even if there is a speck of anger, bitterness, jealousy, etc. in my heart toward another person, that is a sin. Thankfully, God forgives us and loves us anyway! Now if only we could all be that way, huh? ;)
Thursday, August 26, 2010
In The Right Direction
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer...
This is something that I'm working on today. The past few days have been a trial in more ways than one. I have lost my bearings on a couple of occasions. I am so thankful that God is so graciouis, so loving and so kind as to help me back to my feet again and point me in the right direction!
Each night before I go to bed, I write down my blessings, things that have made me happy during the day. It really helps me to remember that even though sometimes it seems dark and uncertain, God doesn't withhold the good things! Sometimes we are just so wrapped up in our own issues that we don't see what is right in front of us.
Today will no doubt be a wonderful day and I hope that it brings you many blessings as well! :o)
This is something that I'm working on today. The past few days have been a trial in more ways than one. I have lost my bearings on a couple of occasions. I am so thankful that God is so graciouis, so loving and so kind as to help me back to my feet again and point me in the right direction!
Each night before I go to bed, I write down my blessings, things that have made me happy during the day. It really helps me to remember that even though sometimes it seems dark and uncertain, God doesn't withhold the good things! Sometimes we are just so wrapped up in our own issues that we don't see what is right in front of us.
Today will no doubt be a wonderful day and I hope that it brings you many blessings as well! :o)
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
The Rosary
Those who know me in "real life" and on a daily basis know how important the rosary is to me. It is the first thing I do in the morning, sometimes even before I step foot out of bed. It helps me to focus, to start the day off close to our Lord and our sweet Mother Mary. Typically, I pray a full rosary three times a day; the first for myself, the second for my family (and friends!) and the third for vocation. It takes about twenty minutes each time (unless I'm doing it in Latin, which is sometimes 5-10 minutes longer) and I certainly cannot claim that spending an hour a day in prayer is too much!
The benefits of praying the rosary are so great that I'll only touch on a few of them here. First -- it gives me complete peace. No matter what mood I am in when I pick up those rosary beads, my spirit is instantly lifted as I focus on the prayers. I sometimes grab the rosary beads when I'm angry or upset and just start praying and almost immediately, those bad feelings diminish. Second -- it helps me to know that our Blessed Mother hears those prayers and intercedes for me for all of my intentions if it is God's will that they be granted. Third -- it gives me comfort in times of illness or distress. When my time is spent in prayer, I have less time to spend worrying! Fourth -- it helps me to know that praying the rosary is something that Mary has asked us to do here on earth. To do what our Lord's Mother asks us to do should be an honor for all of us. After all, she was the one who submitted to God's will and gave birth to the One who would save us all -- it's the least we can do!
Of course, there are also the Fifteen Promises for Praying the Rosary (straight from Mary herself!): 1) Whosoever shall faithfully serve me by the recitation of the Rosary shall receive signal graces. 2) I promise my special protection and the greatest graces to all those who shall recite the Rosary. 3) The Rosary shall be a powerful armor against hell, it will destroy vice, decrease sin and defeat heresies. 4) It will cause good works to flourish; it will obtain for souls the abundant mercy of God; it will withdraw the hearts of men from the love of the world and its vanities, and will lift them to the desire for Eternal Things. Oh, that souls would sanctify themselves by this means. 5) The soul which recommends itself to me by the recitation of the Rosary shall not perish. 6) Whosoever shall recite the Rosary devoutly, applying himself to the consideration of its Sacred Mysteries shall never be conquered by misfortune. God will not chastise him in His justice, he shall not perish by an unprovided death; if he be just he shall remain in the grace of God, and become worthy of Eternal Life. 7) Whoever shall have a true devotion for the Rosary shall not die without the Sacraments of the Church. 8) Those who are faithful to recite the Rosary shall have during their life and at their death the Light of God and the plenitude of His Graces; at the moment of death they shall participate in the Merits of the Saints in Paradise. 9) I shall deliver from purgatory those who have been devoted to the Rosary. 10) The faithful children of the Rosary shall merit a high degree of Glory in Heaven. 11) You shall obtain all you ask of me by recitation of the Rosary. 12) All those who propagate the Holy Rosary shall be aided by me in their necessities. 13) I have obtained from my Divine Son that all the advocates of the Rosary shall have for intercessors the entire Celestial Court during their life and at the hour of death. 14) All who recite the Rosary are my Sons, and brothers of my Only Son Jesus Christ. 15) Devotion to my Rosary is a great sign of predestination.
How can we go wrong here? ;)
So there you have it -- a very important part of my day-- the Holy Rosary.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Prayer of Thanks
Thank you for the obstacles that are put in my path because it makes me cling to you even more. I realize that I am not able to handle everything on my own and that you are more than willing to meet me halfway or even take on the burden if I simply ask for your help. You never give me more than I can handle and you never leave me without the sweetness of your grace and mercy. You know exactly what I need before I ask even though sometimes I forget that!
Thank you for turning my anger this morning into forgiveness and releasing me from those bonds of bitterness and anger, and allowing me to go on with my day without my heart being full of the need for revenge. I have no doubt that whatever happens on earth will be dealt with by you when the day comes, so there's no point in me wasting my time dwelling on it. There are things that are beyond my control, but nothing is beyond yours!
I stop and think about the many blessings that you send my way each and every day - all of the smiles, all of the kind words, all of the wonderful friends who have such huge hearts, the silliness, the love that surrounds me, and most of all, your love and forgiveness. All of the greatest things in my life come from you.
There are days, like today, when it isn't easy. I stumble and I fall, but you never leave me. When all else fails, you never fail me. When I feel like I'm at my lowest, you are there with a loving embrace, ready to lift me up and give me wings to soar. Your love, mercy and goodness are infinite!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Blessings
I am truly so blessed beyond what I deserve. Each day, no matter what happens, there is always at least one blessing that was unexpected. I was so angry and upset on Thursday about something, but by the end of the day, I was fine with it. I was talking to my Mama about it over the phone and found myself saying, "It's going to be fine." Really? It's going to be fine? Where did that even come from considering ten minutes before that, the first words out of my mouth before I even said hello were, "Mama, please tell me that my head is NOT about to explode!" Our sweet and wonderful Lord has a way of calming that fire down inside, doesn't He? As soon as the words, "it's going to be fine" left my mouth, I truly believed that they would be. God has never let me down before. I have said it over and over again that my main issue is my lack of patience in these matters. If it's something that upsets me, it's like I take leave of my senses temporarily and have no patience at all. God is probably looking down on me, shaking His head and wondering, "Where is your faith, girl?" It reminds me a lot of Mark 4:40 where it says, "Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?" I have no doubt that God is testing my patience because He knows that this is a major thing I need to work on right now.
I had such a wonderful surprise last night. I found out that a friend of mine had gifted me with a paid subscription to a website that I use frequently because my subscription had expired the day before. He told me he could afford to do so and that he was happy to do it because he enjoyed reading the things I wrote, that there were no strings attached and not to even think about paying him back, it was a gift. To say my heart was bursting with his thoughtful gesture would be an understatement. I am so thankful for people like him who are in my life, who do things out of the kindness of their hearts. It helps me to strive to be more like them. They are wonderful reminders of God's love for us and the love we should have for each other!
Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the many blessings that you bring to my life. Help me to stay patient and strong in times of adversity and weakness. Thank you for staying by my side even when I don't always do the right things. Please continue to work on me and help me to be a better person in all ways so that all that I do may glorify You. Amen.
I had such a wonderful surprise last night. I found out that a friend of mine had gifted me with a paid subscription to a website that I use frequently because my subscription had expired the day before. He told me he could afford to do so and that he was happy to do it because he enjoyed reading the things I wrote, that there were no strings attached and not to even think about paying him back, it was a gift. To say my heart was bursting with his thoughtful gesture would be an understatement. I am so thankful for people like him who are in my life, who do things out of the kindness of their hearts. It helps me to strive to be more like them. They are wonderful reminders of God's love for us and the love we should have for each other!
Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the many blessings that you bring to my life. Help me to stay patient and strong in times of adversity and weakness. Thank you for staying by my side even when I don't always do the right things. Please continue to work on me and help me to be a better person in all ways so that all that I do may glorify You. Amen.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Moving Forward
Last night, I sat down and wrote my brother a four-page letter (he's in jail for a while... he has time to read that sorta stuff!). Those of you who've been following me for a while know that we have a REALLY strained relationship and have for years. I truly believe that God had a hand in all of this because as I sat down to write, there was no anger anymore, no bitterness, just me writing a letter to my brother, letting him know that we are here for him when he gets out. I tried to explain that he needs to get himself straightened out, get a job (a LEGIT one this time!) that he can have pride in and hold his head up and THEN he can find a good girl to settle down with. Right now, he's falling for these women who are as messed up as he is and they just keep each other from moving forward and trying to do better. I told him that I love him and that I hated the feud between us, that we've had a lot of family gatherings that I wished he'd been a part of if he'd had his act together because he can be so funny and wonderful when he's not being shady. Afterward, I called my mom and told her about it. She said that my letter could be what helps him to turn around because he's thought for a long time now that I truly hated him, and if he gets that letter of support and encouragement, it may make him really think about things, about changing, when he is released. I sure hope so.
He's actually been made a trustee at the jail so he's happy that he at least has things to do during the day to make the hours pass a little more quickly, and he gets extra food and snacks for the help that he does. That's much better than sitting in the cell, crying on the phone for our Mama to sell her soul to get him out!
Hope everyone has a great day and that God does something great in your life today!
He's actually been made a trustee at the jail so he's happy that he at least has things to do during the day to make the hours pass a little more quickly, and he gets extra food and snacks for the help that he does. That's much better than sitting in the cell, crying on the phone for our Mama to sell her soul to get him out!
Hope everyone has a great day and that God does something great in your life today!
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
Patience
It's been a long four days with Dylann being so sick. She's had so many prayers offered up for her and I know that God is listening. We just have to be patient. I've been praying the rosary several times during the day and night and I know that is helping. After so many days of seeing her miserable and in tears from the pain and from throwing up, it was such a blessing to see her SMILING and LAUGHING earlier! I'd brought a chair in to sit beside her bed and try to catch up on some sleep and she woke up and gave me this incredulous look like, "What in the world are you doing here?" I explained what I was doing and she kept giving me that look. So I popped off with something sarcastic and silly and the next thing I knew, she was just cracking herself up with things that weren't even all that funny to ME, but they were obviously hysterical to her, LOL. She ate a little bit of something and now she's in the bath, hopefully warming up those achy muscles and getting to feel a little better.
The outpouring of love and prayers were her has been overwhelming. I am so thankful that God has brought such amazing people into my life, people who are there to give me strength when things like this happen. There is nothing worse than seeing your child sick and in pain and not knowing what to do about it. I know that God is in control and that perhaps this is just a lesson in patience for Dylann and I both.
The outpouring of love and prayers were her has been overwhelming. I am so thankful that God has brought such amazing people into my life, people who are there to give me strength when things like this happen. There is nothing worse than seeing your child sick and in pain and not knowing what to do about it. I know that God is in control and that perhaps this is just a lesson in patience for Dylann and I both.
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